Tesla, Rise of Promethean Technology and a giant Bear Trap for Short Sellers

Quick Disclaimer, I use a lot of headlines to paint my picture, because let’s face it, headlines are all that we read and care about.

Alright, this is going to detail my perspective on why Tesla has a large market cap valuation. As of writing, that market cap valuation is approximately 1.21 Trillion dollars.

A lot of people hate Lord Elon for simply being rich, and that’s retarded. So with the dishonest criticisms aside, I’m going to hopefully shine some light on the insane Financial War/conflict in the rise of Tesla.

This article is going to contain random temporal jumps to paint the picture to Giga-Chad-Alpha-Omega-splain it down to some of the lesser folks that believe retarded one-line rhetoric like;

“Tesla is over-valued and detached from Fundamentals”

The only thing those people should fund, is their own mental case, because they be re-tard-dead.

Electric Cars are a bad bet

Before Tesla hit the scene, how many electric car companies were out there? Who was selling full electric cars? Sure we might hear of a few ethanol or hybrid mix cars, but no one had a sustainable business model of churning out electric cars.

Then we Got Tesla,

And it’s paved the way for everyone else to Jump aboard the Hype train.

We have new competitors that Suck ass like Nikola, or the other EV markets that include actual viable companies like NIO, or Lucid.

Then a whole bunch of Main Automotive companies have decided to build hybrids and go full electric, all because Tesla paved the way and got richer as they did. And let’s face it, the Car Companies just want in on the market share, after all, we and them are just following the money.

On top of Tesla advertising a bunch of Features, Bells and whistles, Dancing car modes, and even Fast speed with high torque, Tesla Cars seem to be the wave of the future.

Even if their Autonomous self driving is a bit of a wonky promise, however, it seems they are somewhat delivering, just a bit later than promised. So, there’s some upside in all of this, and their data is leagues ahead of any competition.

So, ignoring all of this, a bunch of Shorters saw ‘Electric cars’ and said ‘Say no more’ or ‘Say less’ and they decided to short Tesla,

People Shorted Tesla

Which was the bear trap, they fell for it.

They Shorted Tesla since probably the time Lord Elon brought it to fame with an IPO around 2010ish;

So, you know, the beginning. But little did Shorts know, Lord Elon is a cat with claws and that this was a fucking Bear Trap;

Here’s some qualitative data from 2020;

Lord Elon Hype Machine

One of the things you have to be careful about when shorting a company to oblivion, is to make sure they don’t have any strong backers. So shorting no-named small companies that publicly IPO’d without kissing the ring on banks or other institutions, those guys get wiped off the Open Market as if they have the lifespan of a Fruit Fly.

What I’m saying here is, If you have a strong financial supporter, or backer, it becomes very very difficult for other entities and investment firms to financially bully you. Lord Elon has quite the financial backing, and is also well connected, and he also can raise a rather large sum of money.

So, this was already a risky bet to Short Tesla based on this alone, specifically if shorters were expecting the company to go out of business like every other Electric Car Company or ‘insert company that cures cancer’ or other novel idea that sounds ‘too-good-to-be-true’.

The Duality of Man, means that Lord Elon’s Ups affect Stock Price, and his Downs also effect stock price.

His random shitspergery posting of Tweets results in market corrections and impacts to his beloved Tesla Company. Like that time he smoked weed on the Joe Rogan Podcast, Shares of Tesla went down because ‘weed bad’ or whatever sentiment and something to do with federal contracts and also Space X related things.

Of course, when you got short sellers,
They sort of want to spin the news too,
So Spin that news to justify price action,
before or after ‘price corrections’ happen.

This smoking a joint and talking about futures in a sort of optimistic pessimism of cynical ideals was great banter, and Lord Elon then became a meme. . . Because of the Joint.

This is the Guy that got on Joe Rogan Podcast, sold flame throwers, built spaceships, Sold Tesla Tequila, sold Tesla Beer, and much more while pumping a Cryptocurrency meme-coin about Dogs. . .

Like, he’s a hype-man if you ever seen one, and he’s got quite the following. Enough so that people create bots to trade after his tweets in imaginary dog coins staking hundreds of thousands of dollars on a whim of a tweet. Like, let that sink in for a bit.

Love him or hate him, there is profit potential in his wake, and people follow the money. Because Profit Matters.

Stock Options, ESPP, and Splits

Stock ESPP and RSUs

Earlier in 2021, Lord Elon Talks about Tesla’s plan and not having 401k Matching. Mainly because Tesla doesn’t invest in diversified markets like a 401k in which Tesla would be literally investing in it’s competition of old-ass-foreign-outsourcing-indebted Car Companies that received bail outs that are still fucking bad and in debt.

No, instead Tesla invests in itself, and allows Employees to also invest in Tesla;

Here’s the reference for the ‘Early in 2021’;


Here is Lord Elon, the Techno King, talking about his compensation deal in November 6th, 2021;

A man of Consistency, Stock options, to Burn Short Sellers. Consistently burning Short Sellers. Nice.

This sort of Stock Program has been happening earlier, here is an article evidencing July 2020;

There is some nice nuggets about the model being used;

The important thing is RSU, RSU, The Techno-Kingdom for an RSU;

See, Restricted Stock Units aren’t allowed to be sold until three or so years later, following a bunch of other rules and penalties. Typically an RSU plan is given to employees to afford them the ability to buy stock at a discount price lower than the lowest low price in a rolling 6 month period. I don’t know the specifics of Tesla’s stock options, but it’s something similar, probably.

So, RSU stock is awarded to most, if not all, employees at Tesla.

Meaning that Tesla’s roughly 70k employees partake in this delicious Stock Program,

-As of 2020

Meaning that 70k employees will buy up one to who-knows how many shares every rolling 6 month period, because you kinda gotta be specially retarded to Not Buy Tesla after Working AT Tesla and seeing it’s valuation go up like fucking crazy.

Lemme just Shoot from the hip and say average 5 shares per 6 months is being bought by 70k people. That means 350,000 shares are bought and HELD for a while every 6 months or so. This is, of course, me speculating numbahs.

So the thing about RSU plans, is that the stock is Restricted from being sold (under penalty of fees and shit), meaning that Employees HODL shares. A hold strategy will especially help against a group of retarded short sellers.

And when you get a bunch of short sellers looking for shares to short with, coupled with a growing solidification of Free Float every 6 months from the RSU plan, coupled with rising buy demand and fanatic followers, you get a beautiful thing. A beautiful thing called;

Shorts r Fuked.

And this is not including the Board or C Suite Execs having their shit-ton of shares, either.

Stock Awards, setting milestones and winning them

Lord Elon doesn’t take pay, but he does take Stonk,

Lord Elon had a list of milestones in agreement with the board, saying that if he were to achieve these ridiculously hard tasks, that he would be rewarded in percentage ownership and equity of Tesla,

So he had a CEO Performance Award if he met some hard milestones which included;

-Market Cap Milestone of hitting $100 Billion and continue for $50 Billion and more
-Operational Milestone for Escalating Revenue and Adjusted EBITDA,

ANNNNDD Lord Musk actually hit these milestones, so he got awarded a shit ton of stock, basically. He got a raise for placing a bet that was agreed upon by the board and share holders and other shit, or something. These stock awards would require him to hold onto these shares, for five or so years, so it’s great for drying up liquidity in the free float, making it harder to borrow against for Shorty Shorts.


So, now the Guy who wants to raise the price of Tesla, gets more Tesla for raising the price of Tesla, making Tesla more valuable by drying up liquidity and making Shorts Buy back, raising the price of Tesla.

It was a genius play, in my opinion.

Tesla had a Stock Split, a 5 to 1 split,

This made the price of Tesla MORE affordable for other people, which created a higher demand side, raising price, and resulting in a Gamma ramp for Option Trading Degenerates. Because their previous calls that they had bought were now for 500 shares a contract, meaning that this made a bunch of people millionaires.

or as they dub themselves, New Teslanaires.

Which further the hype train and increased the buying demand for Tesla, by converting Tesla Bears into Tesla Bulls.

S&P 500 Inclusion

In December 21st, 2020, Tesla Joined the S&P 500 and that caused a lot of algo-robot shifts into jacking up the price of Tesla with a subsequent dip and other things happening on price action.

There is a bit of some other shit going on though. Because the S&P has a ‘secret committee’ deciding if the requirements met for inclusion into the S&P 500 were enough to justify the addition and removal of a company from that index.

“Tesla itself was denied inclusion for several months into the S&P 500 after they were eligible.”


So there is a lot of strategic play when big money is involved in these pseudo not-so-honest groups that we call ‘the invisible hand’ of the ‘free market’. And these groups run a sort of Trust-Oligarchy in the Financial markets, to stifle and dictate growth.

It’s a game of politics, where the votes are cash money. So ‘of course’ people care.

Shorts Lose, Squeeze, and Cry

If you understand what Lord Elon did with the stock awards, ESPP, plan, options, and splits,

Then You KNOW for a fact that based on this Extra layer of Real Financial Meta-fundamentals that the price of tesla can only do one thing with everyone and their mother getting Stimmy Checks;

Meaning stocks go up,

And shortsellers and bears are screwed.

Then they might double or quadruple their bet, because they still believe that Tesla is Over Valued. . .

Then they lose, making Tesla Price go UP AGAIN. lmfao, these guys are digging their own graves with each short.

“The pain trade for the shorts has been a joy ride for Musk” – Wedbush analyst Dan Ives

Here is an interview with a SUS organization S3, about Tesla for another perspective.
I Disagree with what S3 Says here, Ihor, but I wanted to afford you the opportunity to hear another shit-take

Shorts Close; Stonk goes up.

Stonks go Up

Short Sellers are virtually-guaranteed buyers if their bets go sideways, so for someone to bet blocks and large sums of money to short Tesla, and to lose, only guarantees that they’ll have to cover or close their position.

And if they have to close their shorts, then they are guaranteed buyers.

Which also means Stonks go Up.

And Lord Elon Taunts Haters/Shorts

I forgot where, but Lord Elon himself admitted that Short Sellers Fucked him over.

Here is a post from 2017;


Here’s a 2018 twitter post where Lord Elon talks about the ‘Short Burn of the Century’ coming soon.

Lord Elon also got his pee-pee smacked for talking Smack to the SEC and making joke comments which pissed off a bunch of short sellers, such as the iconic ‘Funding Secured’ tweet later that same year;

When he said taking Tesla Private at a monetary price, Tesla Stock wasn’t valued at $420, so people bought more and more in hopes that the privatization of Tesla would result in a buyback at $420. Even though I personally think that this tweet isn’t indicative of anything material, and that ‘considering’ something is akin to speculatory position. But People with money got burned by the rise in price, and people got pissed.

Because Lord Elon hates Short Sellers, and Short Sellers own Media Outlets, so the Media spins narratives to make people hate Lord Elon. Just for the record;

The stock kept going up to the point even Lord Elon thought it was too high, lmao, prompting a tweet and knocking the price down with a nice dip;

Again, Lord Elon in 2020 following along with the stupid litigation from the Short Seller Enrichment Commission (SEC), has made some more tweets;


Here is Lord Elon talking about Shorts during the Idiosyncratic Risk to the Market event of January 28, 2021,


And the sentiment that Short-Sellers should be illegal is a very large statement, because Lord Elon himself has dealt with these Short Sellers fighting them Vulture-amoral practices since, like, 2013. Lord Elon is also, as of writing, the WORLD’S RICHEST PERSON, because of these same idiot vultures, so maybe we should fucking listen to him? Maybe?


Obviously he burned Shorts in 2018, 2019, 2020, and 2021.

How the fuck do you think the Market Cap is about 1.2 Trillion fucking dollars?

It’s from Stimmy and Short Burns coupled with a fanatic demand in buying.

Shorts Sue and Litigate;

Because you lost a bet so might as well take it to Court and reveal to the world that you have no Grace.

People are suing for Stock Options;

Trial is set for April 2022

People are suing for *insert Reason*;

-I was once short,
Now I’m long

People are Suing for Tweets;

I mean, to be fair, he also made April Fools Jokes about Tesla Goin bankrupt;


These Lawsuits alone are more than enough to justify that there should never be any short selling in the market. Mainly because immature pedantic kids with trust fund money can’t accept a defeat in the short game. So let’s ban the game for everyone else so we can stop having ridiculous lawsuit for LOSERS.

L-O-S-E-R-S = Tesla Shorts

Go look it up in the dictionary, you’ll see Tesla Shorts as Losers right next to the definition of Gullible if you did look.

Atleast have some Grace and dignity in your defeat, you placed a bet, and you fuckin lost.

Pony up Golden Ponyboy.

I mean, Did Bill Gates short Tesla?

and lose?

The Answer; Probably?

Hearsay from Lord Elon;

“I wished I had been more on the long side” Implies that he either was not invested in any positions in Tesla or that he was short Tesla. . .

Weird that some really rich guy who made money from computing and technology would use his wealth to fund campaigns to generate more profit following tactics of impropriety relating to Corrupted Hedge Fund tactics. . . Weird, if that was the case.

Wouldn’t that imply that there is an elite set of wealth that sways markets?

And the Lord Elon is fighting this group?


UPDATE 4/23/2022; It has been confirmed that Lord Gates Shorted Tesla.

Evolution of a Meme Stonk

Well, meme stonks have always been around to try and pump degeneracy into the market and make more insane bets. There were groups who would bet on Tesla as they would NVidia and AMD and other bets on Wallstreetbets.

Tesla itself, like the other mentioned companies, had strong leadership. People idolized Tesla’s Lord Elon, the Techno King, just as AMD’s CEO Lisa Su is idolized or How NVidia’s Graphics Card and Bit Coin mining are idolized. Hell, the secondary market for Graphics Cards to supply BitCoin Mining, is insane. That means good money for both AMD and NVidia, whom make graphics cards.

So, when a Meme Cult has a visionary Idol with progress and results, what you get it an occult following of believers. They might believe in the Company, or the Idol, whomever the case, they believe. And how good is faith if not measured in coin? Because you wouldn’t assume the risks of a bet unless you believed in the bet. So belief gives faith which is staked by coin, and now we fucking gamble and put money where our mouths are (plus thoughts and prayers).

Resulting in a Cult phenomenon of buying and being blessed with Tendies and Gains. Which had enough Gain porn for people to hop in this cult wagon.

You’re saying all I have to do is post memes, laugh in unified solidarity with other degenerates, AND I get to make money?

Fuck it, I’m in, yolo.

This is the cult like mindset that creates a radical following of cult-religious investor dynamic, where they follow an idol or prophet to the promised Wendy’s for some Tendies.

This cult stock creates a large buy side demand for stocks, adding multiple support levels, and insane dip recovery strength. As they say ‘Buy the FKN Dip’. I mean, if you’re going long on a company, why not buy more of it?

So Stonk Goes up, that’s really all you need to know. As the Teslanaires ride in their Model X’s and Y’s.

On A Side note,

This is a retarded critique that is disconnected from the actual financial bout that is being waged here;

The Value in Tesla is not from actual profits, but rather the War being waged in the financial sector, and the ability for Tesla to stay afloat. So this article linked above and down below;


This article is missing the meta-physical, beyond the naked eye, war being fought. This article suggests that if Tesla was a cooperative, each employee would be a millionaire. Well bucko, there’s the ESPP which is essentially a pseudo Cooperative, and if you think people aren’t going to sell their stake in the company, then you don’t understand how HR Departments liquidate employees for not having an invested and divested stake in the company.

In other words, Tesla wouldn’t be valued at it’s current value largely in part without it’s ESPP.

The idea of using Profit per Earnings is not much of a good metric to gauge the actual growth of the Stock, additionally the Options market for Tesla Shares is fucking insane. You can make a fuck ton of money off of the volatility, or lose a fuck ton because of a drop of a hat, or in this case, Lord Elon makes a tweet. It’s fucking wild.

This article I am critiquing is nothing personal, it’s just a common argument about the ‘fundamentals’ of Tesla and how to better divy the value invested to employees. . . As if there aren’t -like- investors that have their own underwriting reasons for the valuation of their underlying asset that they are invested in. . . It’s just Doomer kibble in a World Full of Clown Chow.

Also, unrealized gains aren’t earning shit. That’s retarded into thinking you can extract further from a temporal future, like we’re already in huge amounts of debt, now you want to borrow from the imaginary future as well as the future? That’s retarded. Someone should speak some saneness into the Treasury Secretary and hopefully we can get things back on track.

Who cares, just gamble, life’s a bubble.

Here is Lord Elon talking about Taxes and Economic Recessions while using Stock as a way to leverage more speculatory gambling resulting in a bad time;

It Appears that the video is no longer available, That’s youtube for you.

Also, note that he literally pays taxes; and that quip of “Stocks don’t always go up, they also go down” is a great grounded realization for people who think stonks go up for ever.

No one that I’m aware of pays zero taxes, if not directly, then indirectly. Show me proof that someone paid zero taxes while making a large sum of money in the millions or above, and I’ll call you a Twat.

In Closing,

I’ve been meaning to write this article for about a year or so, mainly because I was tired of people talking shit about Tesla without understanding the Financial Ramifications and the War game being played. There’s a reason that Lord Elon is the World’s Richest person, that’s because the Capital Markets are a Zero Sum Game, and Lord Elon with the help of Tesla was able to Fight against some of the Richest People in The World. So if you Win Against the Richest in a zero sum game, turns out, YOU BECOME THE RICHEST. Duh, that’s how it works.

Everyone with a shittier explaination or gay bear statement should just short tesla or shut the fuck up unless they have something of actual substance. I wrote this article with pretty credible sources and substance, so It’s worth mentioning, unlike other people who espouse ‘detached of fundamentals’ rhetoric. Whatever, I take pride that those idiots will Die, just like me. It’s only a matter of time.

Is Tesla a Bubble?

Who cares, Life is a bubble.

Fed Bois keep doing dumb shit and fiscal and monetary policy are dumb, so who cares at this point. We’re just digging ourselves deeper into idiocracy.

Just gamble on a bet and make money, it doesn’t matter if it’s not tendies, or gains, or profit. Because Profit Matters.

Atleast, now you know why Tesla is valued at the value it’s valued at. Value itself is subjective and made by the sentiments of the Market. If you think Tesla is Overvalued, then you should short it bitch. Put your money where your mouth is , have some skin in the game, or stop-

I stopped caring,

Anyways, I’ll update this article if things change or If I’m wrong in some aspects or regards.


*Not Valid Financial, Legal, Life, or Any Advice

Post edit 04 December 2021;

Found this clip via Wall Street Auti- Bets, and I thought it would be worth uploading to share. This was before the stock split, and boy did it hurt whomever had any portion of those 21 mill shares shorted.

Direct source
From 2011

Also, I forgot, this tweet exists;

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