A lot of loan officers out there are screaming internally at the title of this article, perhaps because it’s the secret sauce, or perhaps it’s because I’m targeting their livelihood. It’s probably because I’m spitting fax or incoherent rambling.
The word ‘mortgage’ comes from the Italian roots. ‘Mort’ for ‘death’, and ‘gage’ for ‘pledge’.
So a Mortgage is a Death Pledge. And for a 30 year term, you’ll be paying off that financing for statistically the rest of your life. Assuming you buy a home in your mid 30s and die in your mid 60s.
I mean, buying a home is one thing, financing it is another. So people sign up for a death pledge to get a house that they want at a market price that they think they can afford.
Think they can afford.
That’s the key word.
So let’s do the maths,
Let’s say you’re buying a 300k home, you decide to finance it with a 30 year mortgage.
At a modest interest rate of 3% a year, your interest payments would make your monthly payment about $1,265;
That’s without tax and other fees.
So for 30 years, a monthly payment of $1,265 gives you a total payment of $455,400.
That’s right, you bought a home for $300,000 and you end up paying an extra $155,400 on it (minimum).
You bought a house, and end up paying 150% it’s value 30 years later. Regardless if the homes value goes up or down. So you’re signing a Death Pledge to pay 150% the value of the home over the long agonizing course of 30 years.
And all of that is assuming nothing bad happens and you don’t refinance.
And all of that is also assuming no other fees or taxes. Which, we’ll break down later.
I mean,
You could do the math for the different types of mortgages,
Like the ARM’s and the 15 or 10 years, but it all boils down to you spending more money or less. Making you think you’re getting a good deal or something.
Part of what makes the mortgage thing a scam is the usury and the housing market prices.
I mean, Housing market is so expensive that people actually hope for a collapse. They’re looking for an opportunity to get their first home. A first home is a fuck-ton of stability for someone whose never had it. Even if it’s financed via a Death Pledge. Hence why people dream to own a part of the American Dream.
Yea, people dream of having a home. And then they have to wake up and realize, ~This is America~.
Perhaps that’s why it’s a part of the ‘American Dream’, a home with a white picket fence.
And for many people, having 10 to 20% down payment is not really an option.
Speaking of Down payment,
There’s a lot of fees that go with mortgages and buying a home that people don’t account for. This is not really specific to mortgages, but they price some of these fees into the mortgage. Overall, buying a home is a scam.
A mortgage agreement is really a bank/fund buying the house for you and leasing it back to you.
They’re going to want to insure that bet they’ve placed with you.
And by them wanting to insure, that means they want you to buy insurance for their investment.
Yea, insurance is a huge scam. That’s besides the point.
Point is there’s a lot of fees, you’ll have to have home owner’s insurance. Depending on your down payment and loan, you may have to get another insurance on just the loan called a PMI. So you have to pay for insurance on the house and insurance on the fact that you have a loan on the house.
So twice the insurance. Yay.
You also have to pay closing costs, home appraisal/home inspection fee, funding fees, taxes, pay the estate title holders, and a slew of other fees. On top of utilities, electric, gas, water, trash, HOA’s and other services or fees you might need. Which means you might be paying out the ass for a bunch of extra maintenance shit, like gutter cleaning, pool maintenance (if you got one), Repairs for appliances, repairs for hidden and unexpected mold, water damages, etc. A lot of dumb risky fees especially if you got a stupid grass lawn or some backwards home with popcorn ceilings.
Mortgage is definitely a scam that parades like a golden slave collar, and home ownership is a contractual slave collar of more maintenance for really unnecessary shit. So Twice the slave collars. Yay. Might as well call Home-Owners who financed through a mortgage by their street rapper names ‘Two-Chains’.
All in all, after all is said and done with the fees,
You’re buying a 300k home for about At least 650k.
Cost of living certainly not worth the benefits, lmao
And that’s calculated at about 3% interest. Home interest rates are about 6% and rising.
So get fucked
And sure you could arbitrage all those fees by using some sort of scheme relying on government or renters or some other shit to hack home equity as leverage to make it not suck. But you’d just be perpetuating the shit housing market by having your mortgaged Death Pledge exist as non-delinquent in the system. So congratulations for making things worse, among everyone else. Even if you were to leverage your retirement accounts, you’d still be perpetuating the system based on the structure of your account- The stock market, and real estate, is -part-of-the-system- my guy. IF you’re interested in finding a way to perpetuate this shit, then yea, there is a way. I’m not gonna elaborately explain anything, so go find it yourself.
On top of that,
People just take your Mortgage, pile it up with others, sell it into baskets and gamble on your mortgage.
That’s apparently a standard practice.
Yea, it’s a standard practice to Trade Mortgage Backed Securities (MBS). I mean, the whole 2008 thing wasn’t going to crash by itself. No, we had really awesome degenerate gamblers at the helm of Wall Street.
Not only does that happen, but also your primary lender or your ‘loan originator’ can just sell your loan to someone else. Lmao, and you get none of the profits and no say in that process.
So you make a Deal with Mortgager A, and after closing on the deal. They turn around and sell your mortgage to someone else -say ‘Random Company B’. So now instead of Paying the Mortgager A that you made a deal with, instead you pay directly to Random Company B, which is probably another mortgager or a bank. Doesn’t that sound fucked?
Like I get I owe one person money, but saying I owe a different person money, is kind of changing the terms. And they don’t even pay you for changing shit on you. That’s like if I owed uncle Jim based on a bet, and instead he tells me I got to pay Aunt Suzie.
So yea, long story short, people are gonna sell YOUR agreement, your death pledge, and trade off of it to make money on your Death Pledge. At, of course, your expense. You’re just another equity of stock in their value extraction scheme.
You’re life becomes a blood sacrifice to the alchemical exchange of wealth creation through future debt-schedules padded by interest rates. All to stroke the egos of corporations gambling off the backs of your home’s security and your tied personhood. Basically indirect human-gambling, like betting on horses.
Yea.
Rough.
Mood.
Basically,
If you do the math correctly, for those people living a modest life and trying to get a head start in life. This accurately captures the vibe for people;
This whole Work-Retire-Die thing is not really my type of vibe, naw meen?
In Closing,
I mean, Buying a home and mortgaging a home are two different things. I can see ways to make them both a scam. But it’s also a scam not to have a safe place of storage or some place that you could comfortably call ‘home’. How much ownership do you have if you just feel like some sort of transient visitor in this world? Yea, not much. Which then results in a lack of agency and ability to properly guide yourself.
So, it’s all a scam.
The price for a Death Pledge is an arm and a leg and probably work-til-death.
All while pencil pushers try to make money off of you before their business gets blown up in corporate executive payouts and transfer their assets to a new mortgager. Don’t worry, the loan officer that sold you in on that bad-pussy deal? He’s getting laid off on average of 5 years, to cut costs to help pay the executives.
I mean, what is the lifespan of a mortgage company? Like less than 30 years? And they’re trading in 30 year termed equities called ‘Death Pledges’? They’re making money originating loans, selling it, going under, and getting a new name? You don’t see how that’s a shell game?
You don’t see how all of this farce-hood is a scam?
*Not Valid Financial, Legal, Life, or Any Advice
Post Script,
Found a rather charming meme that describes the ordeal of most people;
